The Accidentals by Sarina Bowen

* * * 1/2

Never ask a question unless you’re sure you want the truth.

I’ve been listening to my father sing for my whole life. I carry him in my pocket on my mp3 player. It’s just that we’ve never met face to face.

My mother would never tell me how I came to be, or why my rock star father and I have never met. I thought it was her only secret. I was wrong. 

When she dies, he finally appears. Suddenly I have a first class ticket into my father’s exclusive world. A world I don’t want any part of – not at this cost. 

Only three things keep me going: my a cappella singing group, a swoony blue-eyed boy named Jake, and the burning questions in my soul. There’s a secret shame that comes from being an unwanted child. It drags me down, and puts distance between me and the boy I love. 

My father is the only one alive who knows my history. I need the truth, even if it scares me.

Source: advance e-galley provided in exchange for an honest review


Bowen makes her first foray into the YA genre with a semi-heartwrencher. Rachel loses one parent that she's known all her life and the following week gains one that she's always known existed but had never met. The new changes in her life stemming from her mother's death brings so much confusion and anger to an already devastated child. Rachel does her best to tamp down her angst but underneath all that is a young girl who simply wants to feel wanted and safe despite what her history tells her. 

As I read The Accidentals I thought that everything would culminate in some sort of Hallmark Channel-like ending. It didn't. Rachel and Fredrick's relationship is shaky though congenial. Rachel keeps her thoughts to herself and Fredrick knowing that he has arrived too late to pull the dad card on her, tries not to be too intrusive. There's much she has longed to share with her father but she can't bring herself to open up. A one-sided connection to him through his lyrics is far less risky than to actually speak words to him and let him in. She's worried that the fantasy won't live up to the reality. I thought her conflicted emotions and awkward reactions were natural though even if they kept stalling any kind of progress in bonding with her dad. That's the only thing I wish was different but I gradually came to appreciate that this isn't simply a story about Rachel and her father. It's about how she's adapting to all the abrupt changes in her life, learning to trust people, and find that space where she belongs. 

It sounds so crass to say that something good did come out of her loss but it is true, even if it arrived in an undesirable way. I guess that's one of my biggest takeaways from The Accidentals. Rachel has to overcome her long-held skepticism that something she's wanted all along will be snatched away from her. Also how does she let her guard down when she's lost too much already? I think Rachel handled things the best way she could and in the end allowed herself to be open to possibilities. The Accidentals is a different offering from Bowen that delicately showcases this vulnerable stage in life and I was touched by it. I'd secretly love to see a follow up, even if it was just a quick novella, to see where everyone is and how far they've come in becoming a family.

~ Bel

The Accidentals is available now!

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EXCERPT

After the last course—chocolate mousse—the three of us go tripping back across the cold lawn in the dark, Aurora in the lead. I’m the tiniest bit tipsy and wearing heels. So naturally I stumble on a frozen clod of snow and nearly fall. But Jake catches my hand to steady me. “Thanks,” I breathe.Curiously, his warm fingers remain curled around mine until we reached the door of Habernacker.I try not to feel ridiculously excited about it.He lets go when we all reach the third floor. When Aurora opens the door, he follows us inside until we all collapse on the S.L.O., with me in the center.“Oh! I forgot to steal my plate,” I realize.“Me too.” Aurora sighs.Jake reaches into his jacket and pulls out a plate.
“Well done, Mr. Jake!” Aurora laughs. “The party in the annex starts in fifteen minutes.” She heaves herself off the squishy couch. “I have time to redo my makeup.”
I watch her walk over to the stereo, where my phone is already ensconced, and turn on our Christmas playlist. Then she grabs her makeup bag off her desk and leaves the room.When the door clicks shut, neither Jake nor I speak for a moment. The low chords of a Straight No Chaser song play through our little speakers.Suddenly, it’s awkward. We’ve been circling each other for a while now—since the night he was trying to be nice and I wrecked it.“You’re probably sick of a cappella by now,” I say, just to find something to talk about.But Jake turns slowly toward me and says something unexpected. “Rachel, I need to ask you a question.”My stomach does a little flip flop, and I turn to face those blue eyes I love so much. “What?” I whisper.“Well…” He clears his throat. There is a very long pause, during which I hold my breath. “Will you come skiing some time?”I exhale. “I guess so?” Another beat of silence passes. “That was your big question?” I ask, feeling like I’ve missed something.His color deepens. “Well, no. I just…” His brow furrows, as if he’s trying to explain some point of astronomy. I love his look of concentration. I’ve missed it.Jake’s blue eyes lock on mine, and I see how our own orbits might finally collide. This time, I will not send the moment winging back into space. Instead, I lean an almost imperceptible degree in his direction.
And that’s all it takes.Reaching up, Jake cups his hand to the side of my face. I’m still processing the sweet touch of his fingers when he leans in farther, his lips brushing the sensitive corner of my mouth. His eyes are tentative, seeking permission. My heart thuds with expectation.And then—finally—Jake kisses me for real. We come together the way a well-timed drummer kicks into the chorus of a song—swiftly, and without hesitation. We broke apart a moment later, eyeing each other while I try not to smile. “Can I do that again?” he asks, his voice rough. “That was my real question.”“Well, since you asked so nicely…”Jake makes a low noise of approval, then draws me closer. I reach up for the back of his neck, my fingers grazing that golden patch of skin I’ve always wanted to touch. He kisses me again, his arm finding the velvet waist of my dress and encircling me.
My heart flutters, but not from fear. Warm lips tease mine gently apart. And when his tongue tangles with mine, I lose myself.He tastes like champagne. Everything is wild and sweet, until the moment Aurora’s voice rings out. “Ay, caramba!”I feel an unwelcome rush of cool air between us as Jake retreats.
“I did say I was going into the bathroom, right? And not on a trip to Fiji?”Neither of us says a word; we only look sheepishly at Aurora.“Just to be clear, now I’m ducking into the bedroom for my coat, which only takes a second.” She steps into the bedroom, and I hear the rustling of fabric. Then she peers dramatically around the door frame. “Good listening! Now I’m going to the party. Will I see you both there? Don’t answer that. We’ll speak later.”Jake laughs. “Sorry, Aurora.”“I’ve seen worse.” She departs, the door closing behind her.And now I’m self-conscious. Rising, I decide to fiddle with the music playlist. “Do you want to go to the party?”“I’ll go. But I’m not great at parties. It’s all shouting over the music, drinking warm beer out of a plastic cup.”“Then let’s not.” My fingers shake as I adjust the volume. I go back over to the sofa and sit down.“So.” He clears his throat. “Where are you going for break?” As he asks, he takes one of my hands in his, massaging my palm with his thumb.
His light touch is so distracting that I almost forget to answer. “Kansas City,” I manage. “To meet my grandfather for the very first time.”“Um, what?” He squeezes my hand.So I tell Jake the embarrassing highlights of my weird story—that I hadn’t met Frederick until this past summer.
“Wow. I’m sorry,” he says.“Don’t be.”“I guess I’m not that offended now that you wouldn’t introduce me. If the normal waiting period is seventeen years.”My laugh begins with an unladylike snort. Ah, well. “With me it’s just all soap opera, all the time. Believe it or not, a year ago I was really a boring person.”“I don’t see how.” He regards me with darting eyes. “You look beautiful tonight.”“It’s Aurora’s dress,” I whisper.But Jake doesn’t seem to care. He slips his arms around my waist. Scooting closer, he slides his lips from my forehead, down my nose and onto my mouth. And we begin again.

                      

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Everything Begins With Us by E.A. Andrews

* * * 1/2

Eighteen-year-old Harper Deacon has never been a rebel. She’s always been a rule-follower who goes along to get along. Until she does the one thing her mother asked her not to do. When she bails on college to pursue her dream of becoming a musician, her mom kicks her out and she moves into the house she inherited from her granddad. 

Smith Dalton doesn’t follow the rules. He bends them to his own needs. After driving off the lead singer of the indie rock band he recently joined, Smith talks Harper into being the band’s new lead singer. 

Sounds like the perfect plan. But Harper has her doubts. Joining a band with three guys? She’s never even had guy friends before. Spending a lot of time with a certain guitar player who is too good-looking, too cool, and too much of everything? That could get complicated. Especially when the guy is a player who just hooks up and moves on. The last thing Harper needs is to fall for a guy who will only break her heart. 

Music is her number one priority and she has every intention of staying focused on what really matters. But, as Harper is finding out, being in a band is about more than just the music. And sometimes, what you think you want and what you really need are two very different things.


There's a certain sense of pride in knowing exactly what you want to do with your life. In knowing that there's an absolute path you want to take. But it's hard to be taken seriously when you're barely out of high school because no parent wants their child to experience extreme hardship, especially when the chosen path is not guaranteed. Harper feels so strongly about her music and convincing her mother of it is a challenge. When the two can't come to an agreement, Harper moves out and vows to succeed on her own terms. She meets Smith, an enigmatic guitarist, at one of her shows and finds herself reeled into the social circles they share. He is just as passionate about music and finally, here's someone who speaks her language. One thing she can't have happen is falling for him and derailing her plans. But you can't help who you fall in love with and so the story explores their love of songwriting and the determination Harper has to make it.

Everything Begins With Us starts off one way but ended up in a direction I wasn't expecting. In all actuality, I didn't know what to expect; I was just there for the ride. Harper is essentially thrust from an overprotective environment into the real world overnight. The result is that she trades one experience - college life - for another - sudden emotional and financial independence - in the process maturing so much faster than she would have otherwise. I was enchanted by her chemistry with Smith. Their back and forth between being friends and edging closer to the other side was exciting and also a bit frightening. I like that Harper never lost her conviction and in the face of a new challenge she never expected in her life, I think she handled herself rather remarkably. Smith's role is not only that of encouraging her but also pushing her out of her comfort zone. There's plenty of give and take between them and in the end she becomes just as much an emotional rock for him as he has been for her. There are some themes in the book that the author dives into which I won't give away in this review but you can look at the labels below if you'd like a heads up. For me not knowing what was coming was what tied me to the book and helped me sense what it was like for Harper.

This is a novel about growing up, letting go, finding common ground and friendship. The characters go through some struggles that will touch you and some of them might seem familiar. I liked the story and it did stick with me for a few days after I'd finished it. I don't know if Andrews has any plans to revisit Harper and Smith down the road so that we can see their progress; if Harper is any closer to her dreams, but in the meantime I can certainly make that wish on their behalf.

~ Bel


By the way, Everything Begins With Us is choc full of music references which made my day! Thanks to E.A. Andrews for providing the link to the book's soundtrack. Hope you enjoy it, too!

Under The Spotlight Release Day Launch

We’re having a release day launch for Angie Stanton’s Under the Spotlight! I am so excited about this young adult romance!! Angie is sharing an excerpt and fantastic giveaway with us, so be sure to check out all the festivities!   

Exclusive Excerpt:

Garrett’s head pounded, and not from the hangover that would greet him with the sunrise, but from being slammed against the wall. Or maybe it was from the few punches that came later when he crashed to the floor of Ye Ole Boston Brew Pub and knocked his head on the beer-stained tile. 

He rubbed his unshaven face, and dried blood flaked into his hand. Great. He needed a shower and an aspirin, but the Boston city jail offered neither. Where the hell was Peter? It had been over an hour.

The sharp edge of the narrow bench he lay on cut into his back, making his already battered body even more sore. He only hoped the other guy felt worse. The jerk had the audacity to call him washed up. For Christ’s sake, he was only twenty-two. He’d accomplished more in the last five years than that asshole would in a lifetime. 

Reaching for his phone, he remembered the cops had taken it, along with his wallet and keys. Damn it. 

“Garrett Jamieson,” a bored cop with thinning hair announced, unlocking the cell. “You’re free to go.” 

“About damn time,” Garrett huffed, rising slowly. He tugged his shirt into place, smoothed back his hair, and followed the officer down a long corridor past several cells with other perps. He couldn’t wait to get away from this hellhole. The officer opened a solid metal security door, and Garrett walked through, relieved to be free. 

In the far corner of the waiting room, studying the Most Wanted posters, his brother waited, wearing faded jeans and a gray T-shirt.

“Hey Peter,” he called. “See anyone you know?” 

Peter turned with a smirk on his face and his hair still ruffled from bed. “Just checking to make sure your ugly mug isn’t up here.” 

Garrett sneered. “It wasn’t my fault.” 

“Never is.” Peter sighed. “You realize this is becoming an annoying habit. You’re lucky your Jag is still in the shop from your crash last week, otherwise you might have added drunk driving to your record.” 

“Stop acting like an old woman.” 

“You have more to worry about than me. Dad isn’t going to be happy about this.” 

“No reason Dad needs to hear about it.” 

“You’re kidding yourself if you think you can keep this under wraps. A couple of photographers are outside. You’re busted. Again.” 

Garrett stepped to the counter and signed his discharge papers. 

“At least I know how to live a little. You’re tied down to a ball and chain.” 

His brother grinned with a smile that melted millions of young girls’ hearts.

“Well, I happen to have the hottest ball and chain on the planet.” 

Under the Spotlight Synopsis: 

After an embarrassing stint on a reality-TV music competition years ago, Riley vowed never to sing again. Now she's behind the scenes, working at the prestigious Sound Sync recording studio, and life is looking up. But then Garrett Jamieson, the oldest brother in the famous Jamieson brothers band, crashes into her world. Garrett has hit rock bottom, and he is desperate to reinvent himself. After calling in a few favors, he ends up working at Sound Sync to learn the ropes of record producing from the industry's best. And he can't believe his luck when he discovers that Riley has been keeping a secret—she is an amazing singer. By producing her album, he's sure to top the record charts again. But Garrett is forced to use every trick in his arsenal to persuade the sassy girl to record. Riley refuses to sing—or even entertain the thought of it—and sparks fly as Garrett finally meets his match. But in the heat of the moment, one stolen kiss changes everything. Will Riley be the first person to finally rein Garrett in, or will Garrett succeed in getting Riley back under the spotlight? 

Buy Links: 

Amazon | Barnes and Noble | Under the Spotlight Goodreads 

Angie Stanton Bio: 

Angie Stanton never planned on writing books—she wanted to be a Rockette. However, growing up in rural America with her brothers’ 4-H pigs as pets, she found that dance didn’t quite work out. Instead, she became an avid daydreamer. After years of perfecting stories in her head, she began to write them down, and the rest is history. When not writing, she loves watching natural disaster movies, going to Broadway musicals, and dipping French fries in chocolate shakes. 

Links: 

Blog | Twitter | Facebook | Author Goodreads | Instagram     

Enter Angie’s Giveaway!! 

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Playlist For The Dead by Michelle Falkoff

* * * *

A teenage boy tries to understand his best friend's suicide by listening to the playlist of songs he left behind in this smart, voice-driven debut novel.

Here's what Sam knows: There was a party. There was a fight. The next morning, his best friend, Hayden, was dead. And all he left Sam was a playlist of songs, and a suicide note: For Sam—listen and you'll understand.

As he listens to song after song, Sam tries to face up to what happened the night Hayden killed himself. But it's only by taking out his earbuds and opening his eyes to the people around him that he will finally be able to piece together his best friend’s story. And maybe have a chance to change his own.

Part mystery, part love story, and part coming-of-age tale in the vein of Stephen Chbosky’s The Perks of Being a Wallflower and Tim Tharp’s The Spectacular Now, Playlist for the Dead is an honest and gut-wrenching first novel about loss, rage, what it feels like to outgrow a friendship that's always defined you—and the struggle to redefine yourself. But above all, it's about finding hope when hope seems like the hardest thing to find.

Sam discovers his best friend Hayden dead. Not something that can be unseen.  He goes through the cycle of sadness, anger, guilt as he wonders if there was any way in which he could have prevented Hayden from taking his own life.  It’s always the ones left behind left with all the questions. Hayden had left Sam a playlist along with a note simply stating that he’d understand once he listened to the songs. Putting the pieces back together dredge up all sorts of memories. Trouble is, he’s no closer to understanding anything. 

Hayden’s death has also affected a lot of people which outrages Sam when he sees the hypocrisy of some of the mourners who claim to have loved him but were major players in traumatizing him when he was alive. His fury is specifically directed at Hayden’s older brother and his friends who used to bully him incessantly, and also at Hayden’s parents who were never kind to or accepting of their younger son. As much as he blames them, he also blames himself.

A mysterious girl named Astrid introduces herself to Sam after the funeral saying that she knew Hayden but doesn’t elaborate on how. He can add this to the growing list of things Hayden kept secret. Striking up a friendship with Astrid moves Sam from being a loner to a circle of friends that he wouldn’t have noticed otherwise. With them he realizes that there’s more to appearance and what you think you see about a person. Astrid’s complexity and role in Hayden’s life gnaws at him and he’s anxious to get more details. In the meantime, the rumor mill is turning as some nasty things are happening to kids at school. Sam doesn't know what to think and in between lack of sleep, grief and hallucinations, he's worried that he could possibly have a role in some of the events taking place.

There are a few books I’ve read and reviewed previously that dealt with the aftermath of suicide. Each one had the protagonist searching for clues and answers to explain what they found hard to accept. Yet with these similarities, each one of these stories handled the theme differently. Playlist shows Sam admitting his confusion and anger, even acknowledging that he'd like to see some kind of vengeance on those whom he feels were responsible for making Hayden miserable while he was alive. However, he's also capable of being rational.  Each chapter, titled after a song on the playlist, sets up the mood and also provides both good and painful memories that help to describe the depth of their friendship. Sam is persistent about uncovering the truth which means he also has to come to terms with how he and Hayden left things shortly before the latter's death.

I'm always surprised when I'm drawn to what I expect to be morbid books. The thing is, I didn't find Playlist to be a depressing affair. His recollection of his friendship with Hayden are all he has to hold on to. I enjoyed reading how they'd spar over who had the better taste in music, often to just rile each other up. There's appreciation for the special language they shared and their loyalty. Sam's loss and bewilderment are natural, his feeling of betrayal when he discovers things about Hayden he didn't know previously are valid. Despite that, what got to me most was his ability to get to a point of forgiveness. Not all the questions are answered because that would be impossible. Faced with that reality, Sam must adjust to life without his best friend and he has to learn to accept that it's okay. The healing will come as he figures this out one day at a time.

~ Bel

   

     

   

If you'd like to know what songs are included in Playlist For The Dead, Michelle Falkoff has put a Spotify playlist together. It's brilliant! Enjoy!

Maybe by Amber L Johnson Blog Tour

 

Maybe

by 

Amber L. Johnson

Release Date: February 12 , 2015

Published by The Writers Coffee Shop

Genre: FICTION / Romance / General / Contemporary / Erotica

ISBN e-book: 978-1-61213-371-3

Available from: Amazon, Kobo, Barnes and Noble, and TWCS PH

~~SUMMARY~~

Emily Portman loves her job. A writer for Breakout! Magazine, she shadows and showcases up-and-coming bands. When her next assignment takes her to Austin, Texas, she can’t wait to add the city to her map of places she’s visited. Places she’s left without looking back. Her plan is to keep moving on, and the last thing she needs is a man holding her back. She’s not going down that road again. Tyler Macy is stuck in a rut. Despite his exceptional talent as a musician, he has chosen to take a backseat with his music and let others grab the limelight. Wounded and mistrustful, he doesn’t appreciate his friends’ efforts to bring him back to center stage. Emily comes onto the scene and sees his full potential, but he fights to stay in the shadows, shutting her out before she can add to the scars another woman gave him. For Tyler to find his music again, he needs to accept the help that Emily and their friends offer. When he discovers that his muse lies underneath Emily’s skin, it is still not enough to keep her from walking away. Neither will admit what they really want until it is too late. Emily is once again thrown in Tyler’s path when she is assigned to join them on tour. Despite the pain in his past, Tyler sees that she is worth it, even if she’s stolen both his heart and peace of mind. In order for them to be together, they both must discover whether the music and their passion are enough to overcome the obstacles that separate them. Maybe finding love is worth the risk.  

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~~EXCERPT~~

Walking toward him is like trudging through the deepest mud, but I hold my head high, my hands in my pockets and strides long. When I'm less than a foot away, his head turns toward me without lifting his chin, and he looks up from under his brows. The white smoke from his cigarette causes his eyes to nearly close before he pulls it from his lips and exhales upward into the air. I'm struck by how incredibly handsome he is in black wool and new jeans. I want to know if his skin feels hot under his clothes and if his back feels the same when I scratch fingernails across his spine. My fists clench in my coat pockets at the thought. This is going to be so much harder than I'd been prepared for.

~~ABOUT THE AUTHOR~~

A true child of music, Amber's parents surrounded her with the loudest beats they could find, molding her into a girl who found inspiration and meaning in lyrics and chords. Raised on John Hughes movies, Luck Dragons, and pirate ships, she dreamed of love and adventure. When Amber began to create her own world, she envisioned a place where Happy Ever Afters do exist. Since then, she has authored several romance novels, all of which focus on songs and the way they can touch people's lives. Music may not be able to fix a broken heart, but it can provide one hell of a soundtrack for healing. A full-time wife and mother with a full-time job, Amber finds her muse in everyday life and the people who bring her inspiration.      

Be sure to look for her other book!

 TWCS Link Amazon Link

 

 

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~~CONNECT WITH THE AUTHOR~~

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Praise for Maybe

"The characters are fun, likable, and well done. It's such a feel good story with a wonderful romance. Honestly, if you want a good, easy read with a cast of characters that will make you laugh and cry, and a romance that will sweep you off your feet then give this book a read. You won't regret it. " - Jennifer

Goodreads Review

~ ~REVIEW ~ ~

* * * 1/2


I enjoy musician stories, especially if the musician is a bad boy and who can resist that fantasy?

Emily arrives in Austin with her colleagues to scout for new bands to promote. She moves into an apartment building where she encounters one of her neighbours who's part handyman, part late-night owl. There's also someone who's banging on their drums at all hours of the night who Emily has yet to meet. As she states early on, she’s merely passing through Austin until the next assignment. The band that she decides to champion already has quite a buzz going on about them but it’s their drummer, Tyler Macy, who is the star attraction. Tyler also happens to be that annoying neighbor keeping her up at night. Awkward! 

So they don’t quite hit it off immediately. But Emily prides herself on compartmentalizing and is able to see that this band is destined for greatness. She'll set aside her issues with Tyler to focus on her job. Though she may be annoyed by his antics, there’s no denying that he definitely captures her attention. There’s just something magnetic about him that she can't help but be drawn to him. He can’t tear away from her either. Their unusual union is based on satisfying immediate need. Neither wants to get in too deep. The band and the music come first. However, when it comes to these two, it's a little more complicated than that.

I didn’t really take to Emily at the beginning. She’s not mean but she’s not overly warm either. Her no fuss, no nonsense demeanor makes her appear standoff-ish. Her dialogue feels more like statements which was actually a huge problem for me with a completely separate book a while ago. But somehow, Emily’s tone clicked with me here, partly because it matched the way she approached things where she tried not to get attached to people or places. But mostly because it was in contrast to Tyler’s softer personality. Emily is extremely guarded and though Tyler is somewhat like that, he also wears his heart on his sleeve. He feels intensely and for some reason, when he’s intimate with Emily, the chaotic music in his head becomes clear. Their relationship may be a little unorthodox but it suits who they are at this point in their lives. Then she leaves even after Tyler asks her to stay because falling in love with a musician is not part of her plans. By the time they meet up again a year later, they're both open to picking up where they left off. It's during this half of the book that I felt Emily became less detached and more approachable.

Maybe is told from Emily’s perspective but one thing I absolutely loved about it was the set up at the beginning of each chapter with fragments from Tyler’s personal journal. Those are some of the sweetest, most honest moments in the book that give us a brief glimpse inside his mind and heart. If anything, it just makes the reader fall harder for this shy, soulful bad boy, so full of wanting and need but also so willing to give of himself too.

I thought Maybe was a pleasant read with some intense encounters between the two, so this is definitely one for mature readers. Emily and Tyler manage to create something with a little bit work, a lot of trust and a giant leap of faith. Enjoy!

~ Bel

No Place to Fall by Jaye Robin Brown

* * * *

Amber Vaughn is a good girl. She sings solos at church, babysits her nephew after school, and spends every Friday night hanging out at her best friend Devon’s house. It’s only when Amber goes exploring in the woods near her home, singing camp songs with the hikers she meets on the Appalachian Trail, that she feels free—and when the bigger world feels just a little bit more in reach.

When Amber learns about an audition at the North Carolina School of the Arts, she decides that her dream—to sing on bigger stages—could also be her ticket to a new life. Devon’s older (and unavailable) brother, Will, helps Amber prepare for her one chance to try out for the hypercompetitive arts school. But the more time Will and Amber spend together, the more complicated their relationship becomes . . . and Amber starts to wonder if she’s such a good girl, after all.

Then, in an afternoon, the bottom drops out of her family’s world—and Amber is faced with an impossible choice between her promise as an artist and the people she loves. Amber always thought she knew what a good girl would do. But between “right” and “wrong,” there’s a whole world of possibilities. 

Review:

To avoid the dysfunction of her family life, Amber and her best friend Devon have been spending their summer evenings at a hiker’s cabin in the woods on the Appalachian Trail; meeting people from all over the country, making music and sometimes hooking up.  During those evenings, it’s the music that makes Amber feel like she has a future.  Possibly one far away from her small hometown.

As the new school year gets underway, life gets complicated.  First, there’s Devon’s brother, Will.  After an unexpected encounter with Will (which we should note she has had a bit of a crush on for a while), Amber is left feeling confused and regretful.  Then there are the two new kids at school; one who seems to have taken an instant dislike to Amber and the other who immediately bonds with Amber over their mutual love of music.  And the most complicated issue of all is Amber’s family.  A dad that doesn’t do such a great job of hiding the fact that he’s cheating on his wife; an older sister and brother in law that are on the fast road to jail time and losing their very young son; and a sweet overprotective mom that purposely puts on blinders in hopes that the dysfunction going on around her will just disappear. 

When Amber finds out about auditions for a performing arts high school in Winston-Salem, she sees a future that includes not only doing the things she loves most but also escaping her flawed family situation.  But in an attempt to help a friend re-connect with the music that he loves so much, Amber manages to break too many rules (and laws).  Her actions could cost the audition for which she fought so hard as well as her friends, including Will.   

There is no ignoring it.  This story is uncomfortable in places.  There are a number of topics/situations that might turn some readers off – cheating, drug use and racism were the three that stood out.  All three of these things were problematic for me but the racism bothered me most.  It was a situational comment by Amber that was obviously used to give the reader insight into where she lives and how she was raised.  It occurs in the beginning and I have to say that I almost decided to not finish this book because of it.  But I was so tired of being disappointed by books and not finishing them that I decided to plow through anyway.  

And I am glad that I did.Because there is also no denying that this story makes you think.  It forces the reader to consider the complicated fact that privileges and opportunities can be so much more accessible to some but not to others and how difficult it can be to pursue a dream when personal circumstances don’t allow for much support.  

No Place to Fall is a great new addition to the world of contemporary YA.   It’s a thought provoking book that will grab your interest and keep you turning the pages every step of the way.

Nat

Beneath The Stain by Amy Lane Blog Tour & Giveaway

Beneath The Stain

by Amy Lane

Blurb: 

In a town as small as Tyson, CA, everybody knew the four brothers with the four different fathers-- and their penchant for making good music when they weren't getting into trouble. For Mackey Sanders, playing in Outbreak Monkey with his brothers and their friends—especially Grant Adams--made Tyson bearable. But Grant has plans for getting Mackey and the Sanders boys out of Tyson, even if that means staying behind.

Between the heartbreak of leaving Grant and the terrifying, glamorous life of rock stardom, Mackey is adrift and sinking fast. When he's hit rock bottom, Trav Ford shows up, courtesy of their record company and a producer who wants to see what Mackey can do if he doesn't flame out first. But cleaning up his act means coming clean about Grant, and that's not easy to do or say. Mackey might make it with Trav's help--but Trav's not sure he's going to survive falling in love with Mackey.

Mackey James Sanders comes with a whole lot of messy, painful baggage, and law-and-order Trav doesn't do messy or painful. And just when Trav thinks they may have mastered every demon in Mackey's past, the biggest, baddest demon of all comes knocking.

Review

* * * *

When you read an Amy Lane book, you’re guaranteed three absolutes: angst, heartbreak and elation when love conquers all.  It’s been a while since I’ve been able to read one of Amy’s books so I jumped at the chance for this because dear, awesome Amy combined two things I love -- boys who desperately need hugs and music.

Beneath The Stain (first of all, love this title) has such a hopeful start despite some of the more unsavory circumstances surrounding our guys here. Mackey may be the youngest of the group but he’s the most pensive of them. He observes and feels deeply, pouring all his emotions into his songs. There’s just something about him that captivates people and makes them want to be in his presence. Grant and Mackey share a bond that’s so intense but in their small-minded town, could be destructive. But they latch on to each other, stealing moments whenever and wherever they can because it’s all they can give each other. Mackey, for all his youth understands Grant’s predicament to a certain point. In turn, Grant is so comforting and nurturing. Their relationship is simply sweet. Forbidden love, no matter what form, burns with such an intensity and these two burn brightly.

Being that this is Amy Lane, we don’t get to keep that happy feeling for long. You have to lose this great love to really know it. And when it’s lost, it can destroy. As the band’s fortune rises, Mackey continues to suffer from his heartbreak unbeknownst to the rest of his bandmates.  At his lowest, their new manager Trav comes in affecting some sweeping changes. Some things go over well, some don’t. Mackey is the hold out. But what Trav comes to understand is the deep-lying loyalty these bandmates have towards one another, especially Mackey and that Mackey is the glue. But what holds Mackey together? Is it something that Trav himself can fix or does he need to help Mackey revisit his painful past in order to recover and move on?

Amy Lane is a very prolific writer who has the brilliant knack of describing love in all its extremes and in betweens.  I knew she had worked her magic on me again when I woke up the next morning thinking about Mackey and Grant, eager to get back to them as soon as possible. You see, it doesn’t matter that her stories feature gay characters because the emotions that she writes about are universal. And it’s perhaps because her characters are gay and could potentially have more to endure socially, that those emotions are amplified. She nails down those feelings, describing them in ways you’ve never thought of before. The fact that she can create such vivid imagery of falling in love or yearning for someone or the grief of having your heart broken so specifically is an incredible feat. This is one of the many reasons why I like to return to her books every so often because for me, I’m not just reading a story, I’m experiencing it. These characters feel very real to me which is why I also have a very special affection for many of Amy’s boys. And now I can add Mackey, Grant and Trav to the circle.

~ Bel

Excerpt 

You Can’t Always Get What You Want

... from the Mighty Hunter Gazette— April 20

And special news, our very own homegrown band, Outbreak Monkey, will be performing a six- song set between D.J. Boomer’s dance music at the Graham Winters High School prom. The band, headed by McKay “Mackey” Sanders on lead vocals, Jeff Sanders on bass and their brother Kell Sanders on lead guitar, also features Grant Adams on second lead and Stevie Harris on drum set. All members are Graham Winters High School students and we are proud to have them play!

THE FIRST time McKay Sanders kissed his brother’s best friend, Grant, they were getting high in a burned-out car in the field behind Mackey’s apartment building. Kellogg, who looked old enough to buy even though he’d just turned eighteen, had spent ten dollars the brothers didn’t have on cheap Muscat. By the time Grant—whose father had money—brought out the pot, Kellogg, Jefferson, and Stevie were passed out on the old camp blanket Stevie had brought from his dad’s garage.

It was a celebration, of sorts, for landing the prom gig.

The older kids had hogged all the Muscat, though, and Mackey felt left out. Kellogg kept saying it wasn’t right to get his little brother drunk, and Mackey kept saying it wasn’t right to drink in front of him, but by the time Kellogg was too drunk to argue, there wasn’t any wine left.

Jefferson and Stevie had finished off the other bottle all by themselves—just sitting quietly, not making any waves like they usually did, passing the bottle between them.

“Boy, you two argue a lot,” Grant said after Kell let out a gut-buster of a yawn and fell asleep quick as a baby.

Mackey grunted and prodded at his older brother with his toe. The three brothers present looked nothing alike. Kell was built like a tank, with rounded shoulders, a brown-eyed glare, and plain brown hair that he buzz- cut short to his scalp. He was like born practicality, which was why hoarding the wine rankled Mackey so badly. An expenditure like that wasn’t going to happen again.

“He gets mad,” Mackey said, letting out a sigh. He slouched back inside the shelter of the car, peering through the doorframe at the iron gray sky. “He’s the one who takes care of us, you know? But not in the band.”

It was true.

Kell could play guitar ably enough, but Mackey....

“You can play everything,” Grant said with admiration. “You’re the one who puts the songs together, figures out who should be playing what. And the shit you write on your own....”

Mackey smiled at him a little shyly. Grant had the most interesting face, with a long, straight nose, full pink lips, and almond-shaped hazel eyes. When Grant looked at him with admiration, it stopped his breath and pulled rubber bands in his stomach. “I just....” He stopped because Grant was reaching into his pocket, and he pulled out a baggie full of weed and papers. “Ooh....”

Grant looked down at the other three, who were sleeping soundly in the late afternoon chill. “I was gonna share,” he said mischievously, “but Kell was a dick about the wine, so I thought you and me?” 

Mackey nodded, captivated by the thrill of the forbidden—and by the way that cherry-ripe mouth pulled up at the corners when Grant smiled.

“I’ve never, uhm....”

Grant shrugged. “Me and Kell do sometimes. But, you know, Kell’s usually a good guy.”

Mackey reflected on his sleeping brother. Kell was a good guy. For example, Mackey had a confused memory of their youngest brother Cheever’s dad, the one dad they thought would stick around beyond giving the baby a first name. Cheever’s dad hadn’t been very patient, and he’d hated Mackey. Well, Mackey was sort of a smartass. He’d probably had that fist coming. But that hadn’t stopped Kell from stepping up and hitting Enos Cheever right back. Mackey and Kell had both needed stitches after that, but their mom had kicked Enos Cheever out—child support or no child support. That was okay. Kell and Jeff had been almost old enough to work by then. They’d only needed assistance for a couple of months.

“He doesn’t like it that I can boss him around,” Mackey said glumly. “He... he’s the leader, right? But... but I hear the music, and it just makes sense, you know? And... and you can’t do it wrong just ’cause it’ll hurt Kell’s feelings. It’s augh!” He was waving his hands around, trying to find words, which was funny, because Mackey actually wrote songs. He closed his eyes, ignoring Grant rolling a number, and tried to make a song out of it.

“He wants to keep me happy and he wants to keep me fed, he makes sure that I’ve got blankets and a place to sleep in a bed, but the music in my heart is like a freight train. It goes and it goes and when I stop it, it’s like pain, but my brother doesn’t see it doesn’t hear it doesn’t feel it, and all there is to do is shove him out of the way. Don’t want to hit my brother with the freight train.”

Mackey’s eyes smarted, because the friction with Kell hurt. They were tight. They had to be tight, because Tyson, California, had a population of ten thousand, and it was a small enough town that the woman with the four sons and four fathers was sort of famous. They had to have each other’s backs or Cheever wouldn’t have survived kindergarten.

Mackey blinked and took a deep breath, then coughed.

Damn, pot was strong.

He gazed at Grant, who was staring back in awe over the glowing ember of the joint. Grant held the smoke for a minute and exhaled, shaking his head. “God, it’s gorgeous when you do that,” he said, his voice choked.

“Do what?” Mackey asked, not able to stop staring at him.

“Pull music out of the air,” Grant said, the dreamy smile on his full lips maybe a side effect of the pot, but maybe not. Grant was sitting in the back of the car, his feet at the foot of the blanket the others were sleeping on. He passed Mackey the doobie around the doorframe, and Mackey regarded the joint with a little bit of fear.

“Just inhale?” he asked nervously, and Grant grinned.

“Never done this before?” he confirmed, taking the doobie back.

Mackey shook his head, knowing his face was flushing in spite of the iron mountain chill.

“Here,” Grant murmured, taking another hit. He stood up, still holding the smoke in his lungs, and knelt in front of Mackey, so close their lips almost brushed. Mackey’s mouth fell open, because, holy God, Grant was right there, and Mackey had been trying not to look at him like he had wanted him right there since he was twelve years old.

Grant took his open mouth for invitation and exhaled, right between Mackey’s parted lips.

Mackey’s inhale was so gentle, the smoke hardly tickled. He didn’t choke or cough like he’d seen other people do, just breathed in subtle-like, afraid to startle Grant or make him move in any way. His exhale was even quieter, letting the smoke trickle out through his lips and his nose, where it stung.

He swallowed, his mouth dry from the smoke and from the way Grant was staring at him, seemingly as mesmerized as he was by those golden eyes and moist red mouth. “How’s Sam?” he asked, because Samantha Peters had been Grant’s shadow for the past year.

“Not here,” Grant whispered, and the movement made their lips touch.

Mackey closed his eyes, because Grant started this, and Mackey was fourteen to his seventeen. Grant would know what to do.

Grant’s lips on his were whisper-soft, then angel-soft, then Grant’s tongue swept into his mouth, acrid with the bitter taste of weed, but something in it was sweet. Something in it made Mackey open his mouth to beg for more.

Grant took advantage, pushing him back against the seat, taking his mouth more, and more and more, until Mackey was pressed against the burned-out seat frame, his hands buried in the thick top strip of Grant’s hair, his lips being bruised and his mouth plundered by his brother’s best friend.

The smell of pot smoke sharpened, turned plastic, and Grant jerked his head back.

“Shit,” he muttered. The joint had fallen onto the blanket at their feet, and he spent a moment stomping it out as it smoldered. When he’d killed the ember, he glanced at Mackey sheepishly.

“Got lost in your eyes,” he said, and Mackey watched curiously as two red crescents surfaced on his sharp cheekbones, like disappearing ink coming to life.

“I could get lost in you a lot,” Mackey confessed, feeling brave and bold, and Grant found something to look at far away.

“Mackey, maybe don’t count on me like that, okay?”

Mackey had to search far away too. Well, of course, right? Two guys get high and they do something crazy—didn’t mean shit, did it.

Didn’t mean a goddamned thing. “Yeah, well. You know. Strong weed, right?”

“Yeah,” Grant murmured. “Strong.” His hand was firm on Mackey’s shoulder then, and Mackey closed his eyes as he felt the rasp of Grant’s chilled palm against his cheek. “Stronger’n shame.”

Mackey had to. Had to see his face.

Grant was blinking hard, and they both knew he’d deny it, but one hit of pot didn’t give you eyeballs that red.

At their feet, Kell gave a moan and rolled over, and that was the cue for everyone to wake up. They were headachy and sick, and it was lucky Grant had brought a six-pack of water, of all things, so they could at least rinse out their mouths after they puked.

Grant had driven them out to the vacant field in his mom’s minivan, and later that evening, he stopped and let them run inside the grocery store to buy noodles and spaghetti sauce for dinner. They’d promised their mom they’d take care of groceries if she let them get away with not watching Cheever for the afternoon. When they got to the Sanders boys’ apartment complex, Grant and Kell were giving each other shit in the front seat. Mackey stared out the window and let their banter wash over him, just like he ignored Jefferson and Stevie talking in quiet undertones about comic books and naked girl pictures. Jeff and Kell had best friends. Mackey had brothers—six of them, if he counted Cheever’s little friend Kevin, which he did.

“So, is Sam excited you get to play at the prom?” Kell asked, laughing.

“Yeah,” Grant said. For a moment, he caught Mackey’s gaze in the rearview, and then he glanced back toward the road. “She wants to dress pretty and dance with me in a suit.”

Mackey didn’t make a noise or anything, but suddenly he knew, knew like it had been branded on his skin, that Grant didn’t want to dance with a girl in a dress. And that it would hurt worse than orange juice on chapped lips, but Mackey was going to have to watch him do it. 

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About The Author

Amy Lane has four children, two cats, a love starved Chi-who-what, a crumbling mortgage and an indulgent spouse. She also has too damned much yarn, a penchant for action adventure movies, and a need to know that somewhere in all the pain is a story of Wuv, Twu Wuv, which she continues to believe in to this day! She writes fantasy, urban fantasy, and m/m romance--and if you give her enough diet coke and chocolate, she'll bore you to tears with why those three genres go together. She'll also tell you that sacrifices, large and small, are worth the urge to write.

Author Links:

Website: www.greenshill.com
Blog: www.writerslane.blogspot.com
E-mail: amylane@greenshill.com
Facebook: www.facebook.com/amy.lane.167

Twitter: https://twitter.com/amymaclane

Goodreads: https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/151973.Amy_Lane

Many, many thank you to our friend Amy Lane and Viviana at Enchantress of Books Blog Tours.

~ Bel